Most of the people you meet will tell you 'rights and wrongs' of the world. Not of 'the' world but of the world as they know it to be.
And Most of it is crap because how they see life is not how you see life. Most of it is their frustrations and opinion that will never come in agreement with yours. Don't pay attention.
But there are special kind of people - let's call them 'Bar Raisers' because they raise the bar. Every time you ship something, they raise the bar. They inspire you to do better. They make you want to do it better.
How? There are many ways - most of the times they will do it better. At other times, they will show you a better way. Introduce you to a new way. And so on. There is something about them that makes you expect more from you.
Don't get me wrong; I am not talking about the people who compete with you to make you look less important. I am talking about people who know you can be better - who know you to be better. And they don't make you feel less - they make you feel more worthy.
How do you tell crap from Bar Raisers?
- Oppose you and your beliefs.
- More interested in argument than discussions.
- Just have to say something.
- They rarely ship anything on their own.
- They don't expect anything from you, they are just saying because that's what they do - throw their shit around.
- Don't challenge your belief - at least not in words (worst way to do that). If they need to challenge them - they will make you ask.
- They talk and discuss - give you reasoning and are eager.
- Have something to say - often you will ask them for advice.
- They ship - that's how they show you the better way.
- They expect you to do better. You can feel it. They don't need to tell you.
When you ship:
Crap-ers will eat your head. They will hate you for it.
Bar raisers will… raise the bar. So you jump higher. That's whom you want to be friends with. These are the people who want to hang out with.
There are communities full of bar raisers. Go seek them. You will not see a bar raiser wearing a tag on their fore-head; but you will feel when they are around.
And yes, most of the bar raisers are hackers. (Hackers as in those who raise the bar, not the crackers - who crack a code or something).
Don't worry, next time you meet one you will know - they will raise the bar.
I shared my bar raisers with you, who raises the bar for you?